Going Solo: Kinks & Fetishes for One

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When it comes to solo play, things can get kind of routine. It can be tempting to stick with those tried and true methods of pleasing yourself - you know it works, and you know it works well. But don’t you want more than that? Isn’t it time to really indulge yourself?

Just because you’re going solo doesn’t mean things have to be vanilla. You don’t have to be partnered up to explore new avenues of sexual bliss. Exploring the world of kinks and fetishes by yourself might just give you answers to questions you didn’t even know you had. 

What kinds of kinks and fetishes can be enjoyed by yourself?
Well, you might be surprised.

We did a podcast on this topic! Listen below or on iTunes, Google Podcasts and Spotify.

Solo Role Play 

While it’s true that role play is more elaborate with a partner, it’s not impossible on your own and you may actually be surprised how erotic it can be to live out a fantasy all on your own accord. 

Solo role-playing can give you an opportunity to live out some of your freakier fantasies, maybe even exploring new scenarios you haven’t quite gotten up the courage to try with a partner yet.

Solo role play can be the ultimate way to hone your performance, get in tune with what really turns you on and give your alone time a whole new twist...which can ultimately make it all the more intense when you start role-playing with a partner. 


Bondage might be one of those things you assume you can’t accomplish alone, and while you might not be able to set up elaborately inescapable scenarios, you can still experiment with self-bondage.

The feeling of harsh rope tight against your skin can be exhilarating. Achieving this alone can be tricky, but once you start learning different techniques for solo bondage, things can start to heat up fast.

There are even quite a few Youtube tutorials on different rope ties you can do by yourself, as well as instructional videos on how to tie certain knots so you can later teach your favorite bondage techniques to a partner. 

Oh, and if you’re feeling particularly naughty...a crotch rope can be so discrete you can even wear it out of the house under your everyday clothes.  

If you’re looking for something riskier and get off on the thrill of strict bondage, this is possible with release mechanisms that can be activated after a certain amount of time. 

One of the easiest and relatively safest release mechanisms you can use solo are ice locks. This is where you restrain yourself after freezing the lock to your harness or chains in ice. The ice lock is then placed within reach of your free hand, and you have to wait until the ice melts to be able to break free. 

You can actually buy specific ice-lock bondage toys (like these handcuffs), but you can also recreate the same effect by using a regular lock on your restraints and freezing the key in ice using an ice cube tray. 

Live Cam & Obeying Orders

Are you a sub without a master? There are still plenty of ways to engage in your preferred role, even when you’re single. 

First of all: whatever you’re into, there is always someone out there wanting to watch. Even practicing by yourself on a rainy Tuesday night - you can spice things up with an audience. 

Instruction play is also something you can get into with live cam websites. If you’re a submissive looking for a dominant but don’t currently have a partner, there are plenty of ways a dominant stranger with a strong internet connection and webcam can help you get off. 


If being punished is your thing, you don’t have to wait around for a dom to enter your life. Taking things into your own hands, quite literally, and practicing safe self-punishment kinks can be just as satisfying...especially if you have toys to help you. 

Enter the world of BDSM toys - many of them you can use on yourself. 

Some of the more common toys that you can enjoy solo are: 

And who says you have to go shopping? There are plenty of ways you can get yourself off using DIY home solutions such as clothespins for nipple clamps or ordinary candles for drip candles. 

Orgasm Edge Play

Edgeplay can mean a few different things in the BDSM world, depending on the context - and most edge play demands a partner as it can be even more dangerous to participate in alone. 

However, when going solo, the kind of edgeplay we are talking about is climax edge play. 

Revving up your engine, acting out your wildest masturbation fantasies, using all the toys in your arsenal, bringing yourself seconds away from climax...and then stopping. 

Pushing your own limits, seeing what it takes to get you where you need to go and having that kind of complete control over your own body and mind can be so empowering. Not to mention it is intensely erotic and insanely rewarding once the seemingly unattainable orgasm courses through your body. 

More of What You Like

You have some time to spare, you’re in the mood for something fun and sexy - why not explore more of what you’re into? 

Do you have a foot fetish? Have you ever thought of recording videos of your own feet and posting them online? Maybe you’re into watching self-punishment porn but have never really considered trying it on yourself. Going solo is the perfect time to hone in on what turns you on and find other ways of pursuing that.

The feeling of knowing you’re pleasing someone out there who has similar tastes can be such a turn on. It’s like an erotic, sensual euphoria when you dive deeper into what turns you on in order to find ways to tease and please others. 

Looking for Something New

Why not try something you’ve always been curious about? Maybe you’ll end up stumbling into something you never even considered before.

When you’re in a relationship, there isn’t always much time for self-exploration - and when you try new things, those things are made for partner play. 

Trying new things by yourself lets you openly express interests that you might not be super confident about sharing with a partner yet. 

Being alone gives you time to let your mind wander into unknown territory, and not having a partner around can allow you to go as far as you want to go. You’re in total control. 

Diving deeper into what turns you on, finding new expressions of your hidden desires and expanding your world to things you hadn’t considered before can be great ways to get your heart racing and put you in the mood for indulgence and sensual bliss.