The world of kinks has many different terms and sometimes these terms get mixed in with each other, often being interchangeably used when, in fact, they are all very different things. So, when we’re dealing with a specific kink or fetish, I like to take a minute to lay out some simple definitions to make things easier...
The breeding kink is when you become sexually aroused by the idea of having unprotected sex with someone with the goal of breeding or impregnating them - or when you become sexually aroused with the idea of having unprotected sex with the goal of becoming pregnant.
As with most things sex, there are kinks and then there are fetishes. A kink refers to simply being aroused by the act in question, whereas it can be determined a “fetish” when you cannot be aroused unless that specific thing is present or included in your sexual activity.
So, with that, we can say that a breeding fetish is when there really isn’t any sexual arousal unless the potential of impregnating someone (or becoming pregnant via unprotected sex) is present.
A cum kink is when you are sexually aroused with the idea of cum - this could be the taste, the texture, the feel, or even just the idea of it. Cum kinks often play a role in females who have a breeding fetish because the thing that arouses them most is the idea of someone breeding them or ejaculating inside them.
Risky play kinks
While not so often discussed, I think it’s important to hone in one umbrella kink that could explain why you (or your partner) have any/all of the other kinks or fetishes talked about in this article...risky play kinks.
Being turned on by risk and danger is absolutely nothing new and is far more common than you think. The idea of something being dangerous or risky plays a factor in many kinks - from simple public sex acts to breathplay, knife play and other more dangerous sex acts, much of the time, part (if not all) of the excitement is the element of risk or danger.
With breeding kinks, the “danger” (whether real or simulated) is pregnancy or the transmission of STIs.
An impregnation fetish can be described as intense arousal from the possibility of impregnating someone (or becoming pregnant) from the act of unprotected sex. Both men and women can have an impregnation fetish - with the female desiring to be bred by their sexual partner and the male desiring to breed their sexual partner.
An impregnation fetish is separate from a pregnancy fetish, which focuses more on the pregnancy itself rather than the act of breeding.
When we’re talking about breeding someone else, we’re most likely dealing with a male who has the desire to breed a female during sex (you know, since males come with the stuff that makes breeding possible).
Why is this so appealing to men?
The ultimate act of dominance
BDSM is an extremely vast thing that has so many different facets. Dominance, for example - there are countless ways you can show dominance to your submissive partner and one of those ways is to breed her (or roleplay that you’re breeding her.)
This kind of dominance is rooted mostly in ownership and territory, which is why you may see a breeding fetish/consensual non-consent roleplay being paired together. The thought of breeding someone seemingly against their will brings two major parts of dominance together in one fantasy.
While I don’t really want to draw a parallel between a dog peeing on something to mark his territory and a man breeding with someone to assert his “ownership” over her...I’d be remiss if I didn’t point this out.
Sometimes the act of dominance isn’t enough, you have to “ruin her” for others by using her or breeding with her. For many people, this is the biggest appeal.
The ultimate risk?
For some people, the thrill and sexual satisfaction are in the “near miss” that could happen if there is unprotected sex and the woman doesn’t become pregnant.
“Getting her pregnant is not a win...it’s losing the game,” a breeding fetishist tells Vice of his personal preferences on the topic.
While I understand the thrill here, I just have to say: there are other ways to feel the rush of excitement from a “risky” situation without actually putting yourself in a risky situation. For example, she could be on a type of birth control that doesn’t require the male to use a condom and you both could have discussed STI testing beforehand. This way you get to have that incredible “bareback, risky sex” feeling without actually risking all much chance of pregnancy or STI transmission.
Marking her with your genes
For others, pregnancy is the goal. For some, breeding kinks and an impregnation fetish go hand in hand. The desire to procreate is something that is strong and primal, and if the two people involved are attempting to have a child together, the act of “marking her” with his semen in order to (hopefully) get her pregnant can be extremely erotic.
Female breeding fetishes, maybe surprisingly to some, do exist. What’s it like to be bred by someone, to want to feel their cum inside you, to want to be marked by them? Why do some women like this?
With some personal experience on the matter (I mean, you don’t end up having kids without being bred, right?) I can lay out some quick first-glance appeals that I enjoyed:
Some other reasons women may find the idea of being bred sexy are…
Being “forced” (consensual non-consent)
While this may surprise you, CNC is actually a fantasy many women have. In fact, studies show 61% of women have had fantasies about forced sexual activity, with 21% of those women saying it’s a regular fantasy of theirs.
The idea of being bred during CNC is likely just as common, as it ramps up the risk and thrill factors.
Risky behaviors and secrets
Speaking of risky behaviors, sometimes that’s the main motivation for women who are into breeding - the fear and risk of becoming pregnant. This could be coupled with another risk behavior such as infidelity, which, again, ramps up the thrill of it all.
I feel like I need to say this (disclaimers all around) - there are always, always ways to practice “risky sex” in a “safer” way. Using other forms of birth control so you can roleplay breeding kinks or pretending to be strangers to you can roleplay stranger sex without the risk of STIs.
As with many kinks and fetishes, what we know about them (or I should say, what attracts us to them) is mostly what we see in the media (namely, in the porn we watch). There are quite a few things in mainstream porn that could be used as reasons why we find breeding so erotic.
Condoms were never really thought of as sexy.
While we’re beginning to see a lot more condom usage with the rise in amateur porn, for a long time, condoms or other methods of protection weren’t often seen to be used in porn. Whether they were or weren’t, perhaps they were edited out for sex appeal, but this may have led to the notion that watching (and having) unprotected sex is more attractive than stopping to put on a condom.
There isn’t a whole lot of talking, so birth control plans aren’t really laid out.
Along with the whole “condomless porn” scene in popular porn videos is the fact that birth control just isn’t really addressed as much in porn. Whether or not the women in the videos are on some form of birth control are never mentioned - we just see her being bred. We see her being filled with cum and we see how pleasurable that appears to be for her and opinions form in our minds that cum is essential to pleasure.
The messier, the better.
This is just one porn truth that is really just plain and simple fact: the messier the better. Messy creampies, cumshots, squirting scenes - you name it, when cum gets messy, it’s really sexy. This only reinforces the idea that breeding and cum are sexy, which could be one of the reasons why so many people identify with this fetish.
The cum shots are (much of the time) the main event.
With websites like PornHub actually timestamping when orgasms happen, we’re all just essentially waiting for the big build-up to give way and for the messy, sexy, erotic orgasm to take over. Not to mention the plethora of “cum tribute” videos, where the orgasm is dedicated to someone, in particular, making the appeal of breeding even more intense.
With camera angles that promote how sexy it is to finish inside your partner or to be filled up by your partner’s cum, it’s really not surprising that so many of us think breeding is hot.
From my personal experience, yes - it’s super common. But of course, I had to do some digging to see just how common it actually was. While there aren’t any real studies done on these types of topics, I was able to find some quotes from various sexologists and sex therapists on how common the kink is and why some people may like it.
Dr. Chris Donaghue, a sex therapist, and author explains in this Vice article: “The reason why people get aroused by risk and pregnancy is that our brain registers arousal and anxiety often as the same thing.”
This logic totally checks out, according to Grace Point Wellness: “It turns out we actually perform better when we experience a little anxiety. This is especially true in sports and similar performance situations. Low to moderate levels of anxiety, over a short period of time, heighten our arousal in a beneficial way.”
While researching this topic, I was having a hard time finding more information and thought to myself: who knows more about breeding fetishes than breeding fetishists?
So, I turned to Reddit. Naturally.
The NSFW subreddit for “breeding” currently has 214,000 members world-wide - to give you some idea of how popular this is. As with most things Reddit, you’ll come across your fair share of self-promo for breeding videos, but you also come across people who are genuinely interested in learning more about the kink.
As I’ve said a few times throughout this article, just because you’re into a kink that can be dangerous or risky doesn’t mean you can’t take a few safety precautions, right? While the thrill and risk are very real parts of why this fetish exists, being responsible with your sex life and being respectful of other people’s bodies is the sexiest thing anyone can do.
Explore birth control options.
In today’s age, there are so many different options for birth control that can make it seem like you’re having unprotected, risky sex without actually having unprotected, risky sex.
From birth control pills to patches, injections, or even more permanent solutions like vasectomies, there are ways you can make this safe for everyone. Talk with your partner about this and you can come up with a solution that makes the most sense for you both.
Roleplay it out.
While roleplaying a breeding kink is a bit tricky, because you either are protected or you aren’t, there are lots of ways you can incorporate the idea of breeding into your sex life without actually doing it.
Dirty talk, for example, is a great one - you can talk in-depth about how you want to breed your partner and mark them as your own (or similarly, you can talk about how you want to be bred or marked as someone else's) and through that, you can thrive off of each other’s arousal.
Erotic stories and audio porn.
One of the amazing things about erotica and audio porn is that you get to visualize the situation exactly how you want. When you read erotica or listen to audio porn, you can imagine being the one to breed the person in the story without actually taking the risk IRL.
For emergency cases, Plan B is a thing.
I made this the very last point on the list because by no means should it be taken as a way to incorporate the breeding kink into your sex life.
Plan B (the emergency contraceptive pill you can get at your local pharmacy) is not effective as a regular form of birth control and should really only be used in emergencies where a condom was forgotten or broken, or a birth control pill or injection has been missed.
That being said, if you do find yourself having had unprotected sex for the purposes of indulging in your breeding kink, Plan B is something you could look into to ensure your risky night of fun doesn’t have more serious repercussions.
Knowing more about your cycle (ladies) can help you plan when the least risky time to do this is.
If you’re dead-set on having unprotected sex because of your breeding fetish but really don’t want to become pregnant, consider tracking your cycle with an app to zero in on the days where you’re least likely to become pregnant. Although this obviously isn’t fool-proof and I feel the need to mention you still can get pregnant on any day of your cycle, knowing more about your body can help you plan things out accordingly.
Be honest with your partner (always) about your birth control situation and your views.
If you are interested in “barebacking” with the goal of participating in your or your partner’s breeding fetish, please always be honest with them upfront about your views, your birth control situation, and your sexual history.
“I personally do not believe abortion is an option for me, and I make all of my partners aware of that before we play raw,” New Yorker Anise explained in this article.
Breeding is hot, there is no debate on that, right? Men love it, women love it - it can be thrilling and erotic and fun. And if you’re responsible, it can also be relatively safe.
For people who are attracted to the idea of breeding (whether you’ll be the breeder or the bred), there has to be some acknowledgment that pregnancy or an infection from unprotected sex could happen. When you’re able to acknowledge that, you’re able to plan around it and prevent it and have a great time.