Getting the right photo can take a bit of time, and anyone who has ever taken a selfie can tell you they’ve taken multiple (okay, more like dozens) of selfies before they posted or sent one of them. Getting comfortable in your own skin, playing with lights, angles, and poses - it’s all part of the fun.
And that’s what sending a sexy selfie should be - fun!
Ladies and gentlemen (that’s right, there are tips in here for you too, fellas)...whip out that camera phone and switch it to “selfie” mode, because I’m about to teach you how to take the best fucking nudes ever.
First thing’s first - you have to feel comfortable with yourself. Being confronted with your naked body can bring on all kinds of feelings of inadequacy and insecurity - but it doesn’t have to.
For me, personally, that’s what sexy selfie-taking is about.
Many of the nudes I take, I don’t even share with my husband right away. I do it as a form of self-care - I dress myself up and take photos and, when I find the ones I like, it makes me feel sexy and confident.
Before you get to feeling sexy and confident, you may have to wade through some photos that make you feel the exact opposite, but don’t worry, we all have unflattering angles sometimes. You just have to find what works best for you.
Take lots of photos.
Don’t be afraid to fill that camera roll, people. The more the merrier - give yourself tons of options. There is nothing worse than getting yourself ready for a sexy selfie and then realizing there is something in the background or the angles and lighting aren’t quite right and having to redo them.
Test out different areas of the house.
Speaking of backgrounds - why not test out different areas of your house. The bedroom is great - sensual, sexy, suggestive. But being totally naked in your kitchen, on your couch, pressed up against the dining room table - these are the money shots!
Not all nudes have to be totally naked.
Pushing your own boundaries is great - but if you don’t feel comfortable showing everything, then don’t. There are no rules when it comes to nudes. Show a little more, show a little less - whatever you feel is best. Good motto, right?
Sometimes a tease is the way to go.
On the topic of “how much do I expose?” - sometimes a tease is just the way to go! As someone who was a world-class tease in college (sorry, everyone I hooked up with in freshman year), I think there’s something inherently sexy about the power of suggestion.
Dropping a selfie with a bra strap showing or a thigh shot with nothing on but an oversized shirt - that’s hot!
Do whatever makes you most comfortable.
When you’re uncomfortable, it shows up in photos. An awkward angle, a forced smile, and trying way too hard to be sexual comes off as just plain awkward in photos. Put on some music and have some fun with it - get comfortable!
Finding the right poses can be a bit tricky, but once you have a few locked and loaded, sexy selfie-taking will be easier than ever.
Nailing the perfect sexy selfie depends on quite a few things, so here’s what you need to consider when choosing how you’re going to lay it all out there…
Something else to consider is what you’re trying to pull off with this photo. Is it purposefully for someone? Is it to tease someone? Is it anonymous, just for fun, more serious...whatever the purpose, cater to your audience.
Playing the voyeur angle.
Pretending as though the camera (aka, the person you’re sexting) is getting a glimpse of something that’s definitely NSFW can make things feel really naughty and sexy - so placing the camera at an angle where it doesn’t appear as though you “know” you’re being photographed is a great way to add a little extra into your sexy selfies.
One of the best ways to pull this off is the “undressing” selfie - placing your camera on a shelf and setting it to take multiple shots as you slowly take off whatever lingerie or underwear you’re wearing. This sort of “live-action” will make them weak, I promise!
Looking them in the eye.
Going the total opposite route, sometimes all people want is direct, intense eye contact with the object of their sexual fantasies. Looking straight into the camera in a “you know shit is about to get real” (as in real dirty) is a total turn on! If you think the receiver of these pics is going to like that, why not throw some eye contact in there?
“Oops, I dropped my pen. I better pick it up slowly and seductively, allowing tons of time for you to stare at my ass while I do it.”
Of course, that sounds straight out of a porn movie - but this move is still iconic and totally sexy. Now, ladies, I know what you’re thinking: bending over exposes all that winter weight you’ve put on. But, bending over in the right positions can actually hide the more unflattering sections of your body.
More on that below!
What’s in the background of your nudes matters, people. I once had a guy send me an unsolicited dick pic with his toddler playing in the background.
Not only did I not want to see his package, but I was kind of appalled that he’d be posing for nudes while his child played directly behind him. He was a massive jerk, so it tracks. Don’t be that guy.
Definitely not with a toilet in the background.
The worst thing (besides a child) in the background of a nude would be a toilet. NO ONE wants to see that, alright? And guys - do not take nudes ON the toilet. We know what you’re doing and we don’t want it. Just wait and take one in front of the mirror later like everyone else.
Avoid personal photos in the background.
Be mindful if there are any photographs in the backgrounds of your photos that have your family members or friends in them. The last thing you want is to send an anonymous photo without your face and then to notice you have a family photo on the wall behind you for everyone to see.
Avoid messy backgrounds.
Messy kitchens, closets, bedroom floors, or coffee tables are also a huge turn-off for many people, myself included. Opt for a natural background like a blank wall to avoid messy background shots that are way more of a focal point than whatever you’re taking the picture of.
Not only is it important to get the camera at the right angle for the perfect shot, but adjusting your own body to give a good angle can make or break any sexy selfie.
Here are a few things to keep in mind when you’re posing...
Mind your posture.
Someone with bad posture immediately looks less attractive than someone who stands up straight or arches their back properly. Taking selfies with good posture can be tricky, but ultimately it can really flatter your body.
Vertical shots are always nicer.
It’s called “portrait mode” for a reason. No one likes getting a sloppy horizontal photo where you can see more of your arm holding the camera than whatever else is in the shot. Opt for vertical mode on your sexy selfies for a nicer look.
Find your good side and milk it.
Everyone has a “bad” side, it’s normal. But this also means everyone has a “good side”, too. And once you find what that is, don’t be afraid to use that to your advantage. Change up your photos with different outfits and locations but keep the pose flattering, even if it means using the same pose for multiple shots.
Use the timer and “multiple shot” options on your phone for hands-free selfies.
Thank god for modern technology and timer-buttons, right? Taking selfies has never been easier when your smartphone allows you to set a timer to take multiple shots.
Make sure your timer is set for enough time to get yourself into position (I usually go with the full 10 seconds) - and putting your phone on “multiple shot” mode allows you to take more than one photo before you run to hit the timer button again.
When it comes to lighting, it can either be your best friend or your worst enemy. My advice is to try out a few different locations and different lighting sources and see which ones flatter you the most - but some things to keep in mind...
Natural lighting is always nicer.
No matter who you are, natural lighting from a window will always flatter you in ways overhead lighting in your home can’t. While you may not feel comfortable enough to pose directly in front of your window during mid-day, consider taking photos in a room with tons of natural lighting.
Avoid overhead lights that cause weird shadows.
If you have a certain light fixture that casts weird shadows on the wall or doesn’t light the room very well, you may want to avoid needing to use that light for your sexy selfies. Not only is natural lighting better, but unnatural lighting that isn’t great can cause all kinds of weird shadows.
Editing your selfies is a great way to make sure everything looks flawless, but there are quite a few tips and tricks to sexy selfie editing that we should go over...
Filters are great...but too much is tacky.
Adding those butterfly filters or the filters where there are animal ears on your head may make the photo look all dreamy and cute, but when it comes to sex appeal, it’s a total mood killer. Ladies - stop doing this with your photos! Sometimes, filters are great - but too much filter just looks tacky.
Black and white is always sensual.
Whenever I take a photo I’m not too sure about, I test the black and white filter on it. So much of the time, the black and white filter can make any photo look so much better - I have no idea how. Black and white editing options are magical that way.
Crop to keep anonymous.
Taking sexy selfies is fun - but sometimes you want to remain anonymous. It’s smart, safe, and totally fine. Instead of positioning the camera at tricky angles to hide your face, opt for editing to hide your identity with some strategic cropping.
Cropping your face or any other distinguishing parts of your body out of photos is a great idea if you’re looking to keep things anonymous.
So, you want to take your nudes to the next level. Well, there are tons of things you can do to ensure you’re taking the best nudes possible.
Holding your phone steady with a PopSocket, selfie-stick, or phone tripod.
When it comes to shaky camera work, it’s not great. I can’t be the only one who has dropped her phone on her face trying to take a selfie laying in bed...right? A selfie-stick or tripod are great ways to go, but there is something even simpler: a PopSocket.
This is a thing you stick on the back of your phone case that pops out so the phone can rest between your index and middle finger. It’s a simple yet ingenious design, and PopSockets are available in all kinds of different designs.
Investing in a ring light.
Ring lights are pretty next level, but honestly, they are also really useful. I bet you’ll find yourself using this more often than you think - if you decide to invest in one. They aren’t too expensive, but buying one simply for sexy selfie-taking might be something you want to do if taking selfies is part of your brand or your job.
Getting a ring light set up is a great idea if you’ve got a sexy side hustle going like camming, for example.
Sexy new sheets or a fun background set up.
Splurging on a new bed set or even a pretty painting to pose in front of is another great next-level idea. Everyone wants a pretty background to go with that beautiful body of yours, so if sexy selfies are a thing you do often, consider investing in something nice to spruce up your background.
One of my favorite looks involves hanging string lights on the walls behind you - talk about setting some sexy mood lighting for your boudoir shots.
A Bluetooth remote button.
A Bluetooth remote button that allows you to stop using “timer mode” and just simply click a button when you’re ready to take a photo may seem a bit extreme for a casual selfie taker, but you can use this for just about anything - family photos, perfect landscape shots, time-lapse videos...and yes, sexy selfies.
Investing in a Bluetooth remote button for your camera phone, in my opinion, is a great idea.
Getting the perfect shot of your booty can be a bit tricky. You want just enough cheek, some back-of-the-thigh action, maybe some hips...you want it to be flattering, of course.
Kneeling offers a good angle.
One of the more seductive positions for booty shots is kneeling. Set your camera on a timer and kneel on the floor, completely naked, facing away from the camera. Arch your back so your booty pushes towards the camera.
This gives a totally nude view of your back and your butt, without having to show off too much other skin. Play with this pose a bit - put your arms over your head, play with your hair, lean forwards, and tease the camera a little.
Standing cross-legged and bent over is a really nice view.
I love this position. I first saw it on Twitter and obviously had to recreate it for my husband, who sent me this hilarious GIF as a response - so I think he approved.
Stand up, with your feet shoulder length apart. Cross your legs, so your feet are crossed and placed flat on the floor. Then bend over. You can get up on your tip-toes if you need to, but this angle is great for showing off those legs, thighs, and butt.
All about those curves.
Another gorgeous pose (for anyone) is sprawled out on the bed. To do this, you want to accentuate your good areas (which in this case could be your ass) and hide any areas you don’t want to be seen, whether it be your boobs or your stomach.
Lie on your side in bed. This will be a “from above” selfie, so set it to timer mode and just hold it above you. I like to do the timed selfies even when I’m holding the phone as it means I don’t have to worry about pressing the button, I can just hold the phone at different angles to get different shots.
On your side, you can turn and twist your body into various positions while taking shots of yourself from above. Arch your back and stick out your booty for that perfect curve shot. If you’re feeling nervous about your stomach area, lean forward so you’re laying more on your stomach than your side. If you’re feeling nervous about your thighs, try spreading your legs a bit.
Taking a simple mirror shot of the back of your body can be seductive and cute without much effort. Just make sure your mirror is clean (because no one wants to see a dirty, dusty mirror when they are trying to admire your bod) and that there isn’t anything you’ll regret in the reflection of the mirror.
My favorite thing to do with this one is to do it after I’ve had a hot bath - the mirror is a bit foggy, the room is full of steam and I’m dripping wet...it’s a good look all around.
I’ll just say it: the male booty can be exquisite. Yes, I just used the word “exquisite” to describe the male ass. Because hi, this is Sofia Gray and we don’t kink-shame here.
The booty is such a great focal point if you’re a guy looking to send something that’s not a dick pic (which, as a woman, I just want to say thank you for).
The rock-hard ass in the kitchen.
Alright, this was very much inspired by, you guessed it, something I saw on NSFW Twitter (you should really make a Twitter account if you’re looking for some raunchy accounts to follow). But anyways - the “I’m making you breakfast while naked” selfie is simple: you place the camera somewhere in your kitchen, facing your stove.
And you, naked, of course, pretend as though you’re making the woman of your dreams the “morning after” breakfast she deserves. This whole-body look focuses on your ass while leaving all kinds of things to the imagination and it can drive women wild (trust me.)
The shower selfie.
Let me tell you something: a wet body is a sexy body, and this rule applies to men, too. Taking a post-shower selfie (or even a selfie while you’re in the shower), with the water dripping off your backside...it’s incredibly sexy.
The “hanging loose” on the couch.
If you’re sharing a photo with someone and you want to be a bit more daring, the “I’m naked on my couch right now” move is a good one. Place your feet on a coffee table that is positioned in front of you, with your legs spread open.
The camera should be between your legs, also on the table. Push yourself forward so the camera is angled below your manhood, focusing more on those butt cheeks resting on the couch.
Something really sexy is to use a pillow or your hands to cover your penis and balls, so she isn’t getting an unsolicited dick pic, but instead is getting something more suggestive and less invasive.
I’m just going to say it: full-body nudes are an art. Honestly, some of the nudes I’ve seen (that I know were taken by the person themselves, not someone else) are not just sexy but actually very beautiful as well. If you’re looking for a more sensual, boudoir-photo vibe, a full-body selfie is the way to go.
Play with silhouettes and shadows.
The great thing about the full body nude is that you have a ton of options when it comes to poses - and one of my favorite things to do is to play with the light and shadows. Allowing certain parts of yourself to be seen in the light of your bedroom window while the rest is more in the dark can be incredibly sexy and suggestive.
When you’re playing with shadows and light, you may have to go in and edit the contrast or brightness after you’ve taken the photo, which is really easily done on any camera phone.
Spread on the bed.
Let’s just put it all out there...being “spread on the bed” for your lover to see is a whole photo that leaves nothing (and yet everything) to the imagination of the viewer. They don’t have to wonder what your body looks like, but all of a sudden they can’t stop thinking about all the things they’d like to do to you. If you’re gutsy enough for this move, it’s definitely a great one.
Really play with angles and positions on this one, opting to cover yourself with one hand or using positions that show a lot but keep some things under-wraps - this can be a great way to tease and not be too invasive with your nudes.
A view in the distance.
Going the other way, you could spread yourself out on the bed but put the camera high up on some shelf, so it takes photos that look further away than a selfie would. This gives a more “full” photo of your bedroom, so be sure you don’t mind that part.
Another “from the distance” view you could manage (if you’re feeling a little wild) is frolicking naked outdoors. If you have a rather enclosed backyard and don’t mind going in the nude for a few minutes, a simple “from behind” shot of you walking naked in the grass (or even laying in the grass) can drive your lover wild.
Who doesn’t like the idea of public sex, right?
When it comes to sending full-body nudes to a woman, I will speak for myself (but I’m sure not only for myself) when I say we appreciate a little...subtlety.
Whether you decide to go full-frontal or not, sometimes hiding your goods for when she really wants them is a better play than putting it all on display right away.
Spread on the bed.
Similar to the “spread on the bed” for women, this pose is really about teasing what could be happening, not so much teasing what you look like. Whether you decide to cover your manhood with your hands here is totally up to you, but my personal preference would be doing so to leave something to the imagination and not be too invasive.
The “I just finished my workout” shots.
There is something really sexy about a man who works out, and your post-workout bod will catch a lot of attention if you decide to strip naked and take some selfies in your home gym. Whether you’re just about to get in the shower or just laying on your workout bench with no clothes on - the idea of your sweaty body is enough to drive any girl wild.
Kiss the chef.
It’s really sexy when a man knows his way around the kitchen. Whether you do or not is pointless right now, because what she really wants to see is you, totally naked, in the kitchen. Whether you’re just standing there, totally nude for her, or holding a strategically placed mixing bowl - the “naked chef” selfie is that little extra that many women love.
Women love dress shirts. I have not met a single woman (no joke) who doesn’t think her man looks fine as hell in a dress shirt and tie. Want to sexualize this look even more? Take off the tie and unbutton the shirt a few buttons, exposing your chest.
Turn the dial to 11 by taking off your pants and showing her something hard through your boxers...just enough to get her mind racing with ideas on how to please her business partner.
Focusing on specific body parts will cater to all different kinds of kinks, and if you know what kink the receiver of this message has, you can use that to your advantage. Stocking fetishes and foot fetishes are extremely common - so getting some close-ups of the lower half of your body is a great idea!
Dress them up.
When it comes to legs, bare is fine - but stockings are what will really drive them wild. Fishnets, full coverage, knee-high socks...there are tons of different ways you can play with this. Simply slide on your stockings and take some selfies.
For leg shots, you could do a simple looking-down kind of selfie - those are easy enough. Or, you could consider the “from behind” position I described above for the perfect booty shot, as it also gives quite a good look at the back of your legs and feet, if you angle the shot right.
Don’t forget the feet.
I cannot tell you what a market there is on NSFW Twitter and other forums for photos of pretty feet. This is simple enough - give yourself some TLC, nail polish, and some lotion, and you’re good to go.
Taking simple “from the top” views of your feet are great, but really play around with different angles here. Set the camera on a timer to take multiple shots, place it on the ground and really just flex those cute little feet with all different angles, I’m sure you’ll find some great shots in the mix.
Don’t forget the heels - people love heels, and they make for a great accessory when you’re taking photos of your feet. One shoe off, one on or having them placed next to you as if to signal you’ve gotten home from a long day of work and just want to have some fun...who knew shoes could be so suggestive?
I would be remiss if I didn’t include some of the more secure ways to send your sexy selfies, right? Privacy and protection are very important to some and less important to others - either way, there are apps out there designed specifically for sending private content.
Confide is a confidential messenger system that allows you to communicate digitally with the same level of privacy and security as speaking in person, according to their website. They offer encrypted, self-destructing, and screenshot-proof messaging that gives you the comfort of knowing your private conversations will stay private.
This app has even been reported to have been used by several people in the White House, due to its intense security features.
Disclaimer: in my research, I realized that back in 2017, there was a critique on this platform suggesting things aren’t nearly as encrypted as they claim they are. That being said, this is still an app many people enjoy using for sending private and intimate messages.
Signal, according to their website, has state-of-the-art, end-to-end encryption that can keep your conversations secure. The app itself claims that they can’t read or listen to your messages at all, only the person you send them to can. With Signal, privacy isn’t an “option”, it’s just the way the app works. Every single message, every call...it’s all private.
According to various reviews, this app has been deemed “the world’s greatest open source and secure messaging application.” Definitely one of the ones you should test out if you’re looking for a new way to send intimate content.
Snapchat may be the app you most recognize on this list but it’s definitely not the most secure way to send intimate photos and videos. Snapchat was one of the first apps of it’s kind to offer “disappearing” content - content that is only available when you click on it and then it goes away.
Running a quick Google search for “saving Snapchat photos”, you’ll see a ton of results proving that this is not only possible but happens all the time, even though the photos disappear after viewing them.
Snapchat, to their credit, did enable a feature where, when someone takes a screenshot of your picture, it alerts you. Well, not only can you not do anything about them having that snapshot (some other apps will actually grey out snapshots that are attempted), but there are also tons of ways online to get around that notification being sent out. Meaning the person screenshotting you might know how to stop you from realizing that’s what they’ve done.
While it’s true no one can go back to your profile and see what you’ve uploaded, there are still quite a few ways your nudes can be out there for more than just the recipient to see.
This review by Tech Junkie really dives into how that works and why Snapchat may not be the best for sending intimate photos, even though it’s likely the app on this list most people are using.
Dust, formerly called Cyber Dust, showcases itself as an app to protect your ASSests. This is literally what the front page of their site says, and it’s written exactly like that. So they know you’ll be using this to send nudes, and they aren’t being coy about it. I’ve got to say - I like their style.
Bolstering the same “once a message is deleted, it’s gone forever” slogan as some other apps, it appears there is something to Dust. At least according to the reviews. With features similar to Snapchat, where they alert you if a screenshot is taken, Dust goes a step further and allows you to enter chat rooms where no names are ever shown. This way, you can really and truly be anonymous.
Wickr claims to be the “most secure and private collaboration platform” and is originally marketed towards hosting private work meetings or conversations. It’s a video-conferencing platform that many people have begun to use for some….well, NSFW practices.
Wickr is end-to-end encrypted and allows secure file transfers (which many people use to send nudes).
WhatsApp is really well-known for being a fast, simple, secure messaging app. Although it wasn’t designed for sending intimate content, many people use it this way. Hell, there was even an entirely female group chat for sharing and commenting on each other’s nudes back (thanks to Cosmo for sharing that).
Is WhatsApp really safe to send nudes?
Well, I think, from reviews, it’s safe to say that the messaging system itself is pretty secure, but the person on the other end just has total access to that photo, forever. Unlike other messaging systems where the photo is deleted or erased, WhatsApp’s default settings actually save incoming content to the user’s phone.
I just had to add a few last-minute quickie tips in here for you, because through my research for this article I’ve come across some ideas that will take your sexy selfie game to the next level.
Hard is always better.
Ladies, perk up those nipples. Fellas...you know. If you choose to go full dick-pic, hard is way more appealing than soft. When it comes to sharing your body, being “sex ready” is always a better look.
Focus on the parts of your body YOU love.
Forget about what you think the other person wants to see - what do YOU want to SHOW? If you feel insecure about your stomach but love your ass, focus on that instead. Maybe you think you have great abs - focus on that. Take photos YOU like and share them.
Please, (PLEASE) clean your mirror if you’re taking a mirror selfie.
No one, I repeat, no one wants to see a dirty, dusty mirror. I know I’ve said this already, but I felt like it needed to be said again - because the amount of dirty mirror selfies I’ve seen is quite ridiculous.
Avoid showing your face unless you really know the person.
This is a totally personal preference, but consider opting for anonymity rather than putting yourself totally out there, especially if you don’t know the person you’re sending the pictures to very well. You never know, in the future, you may regret that - and it’s nice to feel as though the photo can’t be totally determined as your own.
Anything sent can’t be unsent.
Last but not least, don’t forget: when you press “send” - it’s out there. Whether you’re using a 10-second photo disappearing app or you’re posting it online for your 20k followers to see - be sure about it. If you’re not sure, take a few minutes to think it over before pressing “send.”
Tagline: Show what you want, how you want to.